That was the last day of teaching there. As I was teaching, sans notes, I was praying. Where now, what now? Florence would translate, so I had time to follow each urging of the Lord. Talking about Hagar, I felt the Lord nudge me to grab an object, for she was so very objectified, used, abused. And I turned not having in mind any particular object at all and the lady sitting behind on the steps of the stage had removed her shoes so I asked if I might borrow a shoe. At that point, shoe in hand, I explained that Hagar was little more than an object, like a shoe (and then the Lord showed me…. “who was walked all over, pounded down…”). It’s all the little moments with Him. The mosaic of the life lived in wonder and joy because He is there!
On Wednesday, after the sessions, I thought – didn’t pray — “Oh, it would be so nice to have fresh sheets.” I don’t even think that at home. All gets changed once a week. It had only been a few days. I don’t know why I thought or felt that, it just felt good to think it. Aww. But, then – “I don’t need that!” When we arrived, I walked into my room and the design and color on the sheets had changed. And I laughed! “Oh, Lord.“
Before the trip, I had substantive prayers and non-substantive (you know, like, “What do I do with this hair in monsoon weather and humidity?”) So I prayed it all. I have had a very useless bad wrist for nearly a year. I prayed about that. So, this and that.
Hair- a total non-issue. I had wondered if such bad hair would be a horrendous distraction. Nope. All covered. Perfect.
Wrist – zero pain. Zero. It is 24/7 pain. Zero pain and strength all through. I was more aware of that arrive home. “Oh Lord, what YOU DO!”
Now, there are details of great angst – Godfrey, about 4 months old, in the arms of his mother Deborah, came from the IDP camp to visit the team. 4 months old with two siblings dead/home with Jesus. Lots of tears. A time for tears.
Rev. 21:4 He will wipe away every tear. And He knows better than we how many. We don’t even love ourselves near enough to care. But, our big picture God who calls us into His Big Heart for the world, well, He sees each one and records it. He will not miss one tear of our lives for each will be wiped away (just like He made humankind by hand from the dust and bone, He will take our time of pain, mourning, death, tears, crying (and all mean something different in the Greek – wow) and deal with it personally, by hand. He will not command away our troubles. He gets Himself dirty, drippy, and touches it all because it touches Him right now today.
His patience that none be lost is a cost upon Him every second because He shares that cost more fully with us than we do with ourselves.
How can it be?
Revelation 21 starts out better than good with an announcement from the throne itself – one of the most redundant verses in the whole Bible. There is excitement. There is culmination of all things. It’s like the last construction-paper-loop-to-mark-time-before-the-holiday has been snipped off the chandelier and the best IT IS FINISHED is happening!!